YMCA ramblings...

I have now been going to the Y for five months. In that five months I have not only lost a few pounds and surely made my heart happier, I have also noticed that some of the weirdest people on Earth go there too. Take for instance this one guy who I have seen on numerous occasions, who walks the track in jeans and a leather coat. What's with that? Then the other day I saw a woman not only walking the track with her coat on but carrying a Safeway bag full of groceries?? What is she doing?

There is another real star of a guy who looks like he stepped directly out of his Delorian and onto the track of our local YMCA. The guy wears boner pants, which should in itself sum him up. I run on the treadmill and the track circles me. I have made the mistake of looking up numerous times right at the exact moment he runs by me. I am pretty sure that now he thinks I am trying to pick him up which couldn't be further from the truth. I have noticed that he goes out of his way to warm up beside me. I am hopeful his boner pants don't give him away.

Then there is this weird old guy who is trying very hard to emulate Stevie Wonder. As he works out on the elliptical he listens to his music and closes his eyes, swaying back and forth to the beat. I cannot help but laugh out loud at him. I try to be subtle but find myself pointing and gawking. I wonder if that is wrong?

Then there is the group of girls who come to "work out". They arrive in full make-up, short black shorts and never break a sweat, not even a hint of dew forms on their overly made up faces. I noticed yesterday that one of them wears these weird lace up boot runners, kind of like a wrestler. I think she may be the ring leader.

On a side note not directly related to the people at the Y, I sunk to an all time low while working out yesterday. I was listening to my music and flipping through the channels on the TV when I came across something I have never seen before, and like a car wreck I stopped to watch. It was a competition for the strongest man. I swear, I have never seen anything so stupid as long as I have lived. Here on national television these weird looking men with no necks compete in events to be considered the strongest and possibly stupidest man on Earth. I tuned in just in time to see some neanderthal man lifting kegs above his head and throwing them up and over a banner like thing. After he was done and the white trash crowd was done cheering he would tear off his shirt and be interviewed by some reported who obviously drew the short straw that day. I am willing to hedge a bet that if you were to take the mean IQ in that crowd it would hover somewhere around 35.