Thursday, July 2, 2009

MJ and other odds and ends....

So, it's no news that the "King of Pop" has died. What is news, or at least to me, is the massive out pouring of tears and the accolades of what an amazing man he was. Is it just me? Am I horribly cold hearted? But didn't anyone out there think he was a total whackjob? I mean let's look at this objectively. The guy lived in a theme park, went from being black to white, began to resemble Dianna Ross from the bazillion surgeries he claimed to not have had, he dangled babies from balconies in Germany, made his kids wear masks and fedora's when out in public, and was accused on more than one occasion of inappropriate contact with little boys....and this is who people are throwing themselves on the ground for in a puddle of tears?

Now don't get me wrong I grew up in the 80's. I wore a pleather black dress complete with silver mesh and a bright red zipper. I practiced my moon walk and spent hours gazing deeply into MJ's eye as I marveled at how manly he was to pose with that white tiger. I donned my silver glove on more than one occasion and had nightmares over the Thriller video....I am not denying that he was once an amazing entertainer but seriously, did anyone else not think he was messed up? Did death erase the fact that he was obviously in a perpetual state of being high, that he more than likely did more than just tuck those little boys into bed at night, and that he has most definitely messed those kids up? I mean naming that one child Blanket in itself will lead to years of therapy....

Another oddity of the hollywood world to me is Ryan Seacrest. Have you ever listened to his radio show? I hadn't until recently but the other day I tuned in and was baffled to hear that people actually call in asking him for advice on subjects ranging from infidelity to finances....Is this not odd to anyone? I mean seriously, it's Ryan Seacrest?? The other day I heard a woman call in about how to deal with the guilt she was feeling over cheating on her husband of 18 years with a family friends. This woman is sobbing and begging for advice...from the host of American Idol??

Last but not least is the Bachelorette, Gillian. I am going to be blunt...what the hell is wrong with this girl? Does she have allergies? a cocaine addiction? Why is she always congested? And why does she squeal like a sow every time she gets excited? And if I have to hear one more time about how "she is in her element" out in the snow, in the wilderness, etc...I am going to throw up. First of all you are from Vancouver, you don't get snow. Second, no one is in their element on a glacier...contrary to popular belief Canadians do not spend their afternoons making snow angels on glaciers. We just don't....And just to be fair...what is with the guys this year? You've got one who gets off on toe jam, another one who can't get an erection, and the grossest of all, a bonehead cowboy who can't sing worth crap.

I can't wait for next week!!!

3 comments:

Lisa said...

Oh the squealing! I F**KEN HATE IT!! AND the way she purses her lips and seriously HER VOICE IN GENERAL. BUT that being said, it's the most entertaining as in annoyingly so bachelorette going. And if I hear the phrase "here for the right reasons" one more time I AM going to barf.

Can't wait till Monday!!

Kristen Howerton said...

I completely agree about Michael Jackson. He is just plain looney tunes. I don't get why anyone would worship someone so balls-out crazy.

And Jillian - girlfriend has some serious impairment in the decision-making realm. It's like she is most attracted to the ones who like her the least. Didn't we all get over that mindset after junior high?

Kristin said...

Okay..I remember stumbling on your blog during the last Bachelor and you were hilarious, so I had to come and see what you had this go around! Please give us an update on yesterday's show-love your humor!!
I am SO wondering how has the issues in the bedroom!